Friendship is one of God’s most beautiful gifts. Whether you’re married or single, everyone longs to feel seen, valued, and connected.
Yet, single friends often get overlooked—especially during holidays, family gatherings, or church events. It’s easy to assume they’re fine on their own. However, even the strongest people need community.
To build deeper connections, here are 5 things your single friends need from you—and how you can put them into action today.
1. Notice Their Individuality
Every person carries unique gifts, interests, and stories. When you notice your friend’s individuality, you show that you care about who they truly are—not just their relationship status.
Start by asking yourself a few questions:
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What makes them smile?
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What kind of encouragement energizes them?
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How do they best receive love?
Then act intentionally:
💌 Send a handwritten note.
📱 Text an encouraging message.
🤗 Offer a hug or an affirming word.
🏋️♀️ Join them for a workout.
🎁 Give a thoughtful, meaningful gift.
As my 21-year-old daughter said while we were discussing this topic, “Mom, it’s just common courtesy to be kind.”
She’s absolutely right. Kindness never expires. Whether you’re single, dating, or married, you can brighten someone’s day simply by noticing them.
2. Invite Your Single Friends to Join You for Holidays
Holidays highlight togetherness, yet for many singles, they can amplify loneliness. Instead of assuming your friend has plans, reach out.
One Christmas Eve, our family noticed a single mom sitting alone after the candlelight service. We invited her to join us for cocoa and carols. That simple invitation turned into a seven-year Christmas tradition!
Over time, our living room filled with single friends, college students, and widows—people whose families lived far away. We played games, sang carols, and built a joyful, makeshift family.
So this year, don’t just celebrate with your usual crowd—expand your table. Hospitality doesn’t have to be perfect; it just has to be open.
3. Sit Together at Church (Be Family)
Church should feel like home for everyone, but for many singles, it can become a painful reminder of what they don’t have.
After my dad passed away at 59, my mom experienced this pain firsthand. She moved near us and joined our young church community. Although she loved the worship and people, she sometimes felt invisible in a sea of couples.
When you sit with someone, share a meal, or introduce them to others, you help bridge that gap.
The Church isn’t simply a collection of couples—it’s a spiritual family. When you make room for others, you embody the love of Christ. Sitting together says, “You belong here.”
4. Celebrate Their Birthdays
Birthdays offer a powerful way to remind your single friends how much they matter. Instead of letting the day pass quietly, take initiative.
Write down their birthday, and then:
🎂 Plan a small gathering or dinner.
☕ Treat them to coffee or dessert.
🎉 Ask how they’d like to celebrate—quietly or with a crowd.
Simple gestures speak loudly. When you celebrate someone, you communicate, “You’re seen, you’re valued, and you matter to me.”
So, go the extra mile. Send that text. Bake that cake. Give that card. You’ll never regret celebrating someone’s life.
5. Do Life Together
Real friendship happens in the everyday moments—over shared meals, late-night talks, or laughter in the living room.
Invite your single friends into your normal routines. Ask them to join family game night, come over for dinner, or watch a movie together. Don’t wait for perfect timing—just extend the invitation.
I’ve been amazed at how much my single friends have taught me about faith, joy, and perseverance. They’ve seen our family’s ups and downs, and through it all, we’ve grown together.
Community doesn’t depend on life stage—it depends on connection. Doing life together strengthens hearts and reflects God’s love in action.
💬 Your Turn
Which of these 5 things your single friends need from you stands out most?
Have you found creative ways to encourage or include your single friends?
Share your thoughts in the comments below—I’d love to hear your ideas.
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