by Sue Detweiler
Do you love your feelings? If you are like most moms I know, we have a love-hate relationships with our feelings. Loving your feelings does not mean that you need to be controlled by your feelings. Not does it mean that you need to manipulate others with your feelings. Feelings are a gift from God.
3 Reasons Every Life-Giving Mom needs to Love Her Feelings
The meaning of your life is not measured by the sum total of the mundane moments and monotonous tasks of motherhood. Feelings set apart what is really important in your day. Feelings can give you a sense of immense purpose.
My father and mother grew up in a time when feelings were seen as a sign of weakness. Feelings were not acknowledged. Feelings were repressed.
They wanted me to have freedom to express my emotions. So they set up a “bawl room” for me. They let me know that I felt emotional at the supper table, that it was “OK” but that I needed to excuse myself to the bathroom where I could cry and let it all out. My parents wanted me to be able to express my feelings rather than repress them.
1. Feelings are a Gift
Emotions are a gift from God. He created us with the ability to feel deeply. Part of what sets a mom apart is the intensity of her feelings for her child.
Giving the gift of a daily smile, a hug, a kind word often flow from our feelings of love and affection for another person. Feelings connect us with bonds that are stronger than time or distance.
2. Feelings Measure
Your feelings will measure all types of things. Feelings will measure your stress. Feelings will measure your commitment. Feelings will measure the meaning that you give particular moments.
Feelings are an accurate measure of what we have been thinking. If you have been dwelling on negative thoughts you will likely become depressed. If you focus your thoughts on noble things you will be hopeful.
Feelings are a gift from God, but the do not necessarily measure reality. 1 John 3:20 NLT says, “…God is greater than our feelings, and he knows everything.” He is the TRUE MEASURE of right living.
3. Feelings Motivate
Your feelings are a motivating force in your life. We have been created by God to live life with purpose. Our feelings will help us change.
Part of our love-hate relationship with feelings is how fickle they can be. One day you are motivated to do something, the next you can be lethargic about the same thing.
Give Yourself a Break Today – Love Your Feelings
Rather than being critical of what you are feeling, carve out a safe place to feel what you need to feel. Negative feelings have been shown to be connected with all types of disease.
So give yourself a break… Stop being critical of yourself for feeling something … Allow yourself to feel… Don’t repress your feelings… Neither should you flounder in a Funk
A funk is:
F – floundering
U – under
N – negative
K – knowledge
A Funk is a downward spiral headed towards Hell. These negative thoughts lead to debilitating feelings. The good news is you don’t have to stay in this tormenting prison of negative knowledge
3 Ways to Overcome Your FUNK
Give yourself a break today. Get out of your FUNK.
1. Focus Your Thoughts
Focus your thoughts on the positive truths of Scripture and see what a difference it will make in your positive feelings. Philippians 4:8 NLT says, “…Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”
You can focus what you think about! This is powerful. You can meditate on Scripture. Post sticky notes around your house reminding you of God’s goodness. You can also focus on positive outcomes. You can focus on meditating on God’s promises to your personally. You can choose to think good things about another person.
2. Focus Your Actions
When you are stuck in a FUNK, if you start moving your body in a positive direction, your emotions may catch up. Philippians 4:9 NLT says, “Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.”
If you “put into practice” the things that you should be doing, you will move forward!
3. Focus Your Expectations
Anchor your hope on God’s Word. God’s Word never disappoints. His promises never fail. In the stepping stones of your life, you may find that you need to do a U-Turn every now and then. Even the U-Turns are a part of His plan and positioning. You can trust Him.
When your Expectation is that God IS good and that God LOVES you and that God has a PLAN for your life – your expectation can’t fail. Sure in the short term you will face trials, sickness, and set backs. But in the end His LOVE never fails.
I want to give you a free ebook called Face Your Fears: 5 Promises to Help You Every Day. Sign up below to receive your gift from me.
I am enjoying learning how to create new resources to help others. Let me know if this new e-book “Fearless” is helpful to you.
I find that when I am down, the best thing I can do is serve others. I don’t know exactly what it is, but it always helps me put my life back in perspective. Like you mentioned, God has a plan for us and is there to guide us. Whenever I move from lamenting and wallowing in self pity to helping others it makes me feel so much better.
I have had to work at this, because most of the time I just want to go to my “bawl room” and be a hermit.
Your parents were fantastic! Recognizing that even if society banished emotions, you still needed to express yourself.
Fantastic article. Thanks
I agree. Serving others is a way to change our perspectives. Yes we are all tempted to find our “bawl rooms.” We need a balance of expressing our emotions and being caring to others. Thanks for your insight!